Little Boxes

Suburbia summed up in a song. I've heard this song SO many different ways because of a show I watch called "Weeds" about a suburban mother whose husband dies and she resorts to selling marijuana to support her family. It's a pretty interesting show. But defiantly not for children.

Malvina Reynolds - Little Boxes

Little boxes on the hillside, Little boxes made of tickytacky
Little boxes on the hillside, little boxes all the same
There's a green one and a pink one and a blue one and a yellow one
And they're all made out of ticky tacky and they all look just the same.

And the people in the houses all went to the university
Where they were put in boxes and they came out all the same,
And there's doctors and there's lawyers, and business executives
And they're all made out of ticky tacky and they all look just the same.

And they all play on the golf course and drink their martinis dry,
And they all have pretty children and the children go to school
And the children go to summer camp and then to the university
Where they are put in boxes and they come out all the same.

And the boys go into business and marry and raise a family
In boxes made of ticky tacky and they all look just the same.

So on Wednesday we did the trick or treating thing, it being Halloween and all. Brian went as Spider man, Rhayne as Dora, and Murphy was a Ninja! They were so excited to go. We weren't even sure if we were going to bring them or not because at first Brian was suppose to go to Jackson directly after work, turns out he stayed until almost ten, and this topsy turby decision was also made because I didn't realize we LIVE in a suburban neighborhood. DUH. So, even if he did go I could have managed to bring them by myself, I just couldn't have brought Skylar like I did.



So, after they got their costumes off and pottied, we went...



The older two were so proud of all the booty they collected!


Murphy got scared at a couple of houses and nearly had to be drug up to go by the middle of the outing.


And by the end he had to be carried because he was tired. He did walk most of the way though, it was darling. His basket that he was collecting candy in got too heavy for him, but he'd only let someone carry it for a second, then he got mad thinking we were going to keep it from him or something, so he demanded it back. Silly thing. All in all we had a good experience. We also found out that this neighborhood is pretty neat, but the roads are a little confusing. The kids had a blast and in the end we have so much candy I think we'll be good on that front until next Halloween. When we got back we went through all the candy and pulled it together, then gave them each some, I gave Murphy a piece in his mouth and he bit the crap out of me, caused a couple of blood blisters on my index finger, when I screamed because of it he bit down harder, and eventually I was able to remove my finger from his mouth. Then he gave me his, I'm so cute but shy look so I thought he thought it was funny and when I said as much he started crying and got really upset about it. I held him in my lap for a bit and he seemed really sorry, but I still have a feeling he was faking because of how upset I was about my finger hurting. I guess I'll never know for sure though.

Birmingham Zoo

Sunday is normally Brian's day off so we try to get out and do something as a family on this day each week. This week we chose to go to the zoo. It took an hour and a half to get there, which wasn't too bad considering where we've lived in the past, and it was a pretty nice drive. When we got there the kids were so excited. We had a pretty good time, but Brian and I weren't too impressed. They had your basic animals; Lions, Monkeys, Sea Lions, Snakes and such....they even had a Wilds of Alabama exhibit, that was actually pretty cool because it was kind of like walking through the woods. It just seemed to lack. They had tons of koi ponds, I mean a TON! Why did they need so many? I really couldn't tell you. My main problem with the zoo was that the animals seemed SO unhappy. Look at the Hippo-


He had no pond to laze in, inside there was a small area of water but I doubt he could have submerged himself in it, he just seemed so unhappy! I was talking to him and he perked up as if to tell me I was totally right when I mentioned that he didn't have enough water. I've never been to a zoo and saw hippos that weren't in an area where they could just be completely submerged in the water.

On to the Rhino-


You can SEE his hips! Poor baby. He had next to no room to hang out in, really, nothing. These are animals that live in herds and he was alone. I don't know what they do to him, but he's miserable.

Now lets see our tiger,


He was pretty decently fed, I guess but I've seen privately owned tigers that were fatter than him, and he was so sad. He was prowling the display window prowling it literally! Pacing back and forth looking for a way out. I understand he is captive and its unnatural for them to be and that alone would make them mad, but he was in a small area, no room to play no one to play with for that matter. He was screaming to me, Let me out of here! I want to run and play. I was devastated.

Now, it wasn't all bad mind you. The layout of the zoo was pretty. The exhibits were neat, although the cages in my opinion were VERY small, but I've been spoiled with Audubon in New Orleans, so far the BEST Zoo I've ever encountered. The California Sea Lion was happy as a pig in mud:


He even posed for me. How cute is that?

The giraffes seemed content, but I've yet to see one that wasn't. They just didn't seem to have enough room to me:



The monkeys were lazy and content:



And the meerkats were gorgeous as usual:



They had a petting zoo with goats and sheep.


You know I LOVE goats! I did get really upset around this part of the zoo, however, because not only did they have Pygmy goats, they also had Boar goats. I cried my eyes out because it made me think of Sally and Sandler. I didn't get any pictures of them cause I could barley look at them. I cried for about 10 minutes and it kind of ruined my mood a bit. It was so hard to hold back from boohooing like a baby.

They also had nice Halloween decorations:



They have been having this boo at the zoo thing each weekend, which is kind of cool, we were thinking about staying for that but the kids got moody about the time we finished getting through the whole thing.

Rain Rain go away so my kids can play

My mouth is doing much better now and it only feels a bit bruised at times. I can't wait until that feeling goes away. The kids have been being so full of energy and because of the rain this week I haven't been able to bring them outside to play so they put all of their energy out on getting into stuff and being rotten. I suppose because I've been in moderate pain this week hasn't helped any because when I happen to be in pain I tend to snap at people, I don't normally snap at the children but the other day it felt like I had a head ache in my mouth and ceritan noises, including my daughter's voice, really hurt...so I kept telling her to be quiet and when she wouldn't I snapped at her then I apologized for it but she was upset with me and told me not to be mad at her, poor baby. Brian took her upstairs and played with them for a few hours to help me deal with it. Yesterday when I woke up that sharp pain was gone and didn't come back all day, hopefully today will be the same. I have been icing it when the bruising becomes bothersome which helps a lot. Little Brian has been showing much improvment over the days with his name writing but yesterday he wanted to be lazy and draw his lowercase letters past the middle line on his manuscript page even though he knows he shouldn't. I talked with him about it, and he was honest and told me that he was just being lazy about it, and I explained to him that when we don't put all of our effort into things we do we won't get any where in life and this applies to everything we do, including writing our name. He did really well on the activity sheets I printed out for him, but didn't listen properly when I told him to color the triangle green he instead colored the stars green, he told me he thought I said stars so I suppose it was either his not listeing or just not understanding me...either way I let him slide on it and had him correct it. Rhayne has been getting into all kinds of mischief, yesterday she went into my bedroom and got into the warmer where I keep my wax for my legs, and she decided to wax her own legs...Which caused a big ole mess. I knew she was being too quiet so I ran upstairs to catch her in the act, luckily she didn't get it on her legs just yet and just spilled some of it on the floor and such...which is going to be a pain to get out if I ever can figure out what to get it out with. I tried some olive oil, which is what I use to get it off my skin, but that didn't really do much more than make an oil and wax stain. I'll try some ice or something later on today and if that doesn't work I'll look online for some tips. I've been working on my apocalypse again, and have one more thing unlocked. This time I believe I'm just going to take my time with it, and do one chapter a week or so....not devote all of my time into it may stop me from being as bored of it. I'll also be working on my RKC again in between working on that and I'll also play just for fun in between all of those challenges. I don't want to get bored of them again, so I figure this will be the easiest way to prevent that. So, that's all that's been going on here in my world.

Healing and Getting Results

So today was the first day Brian was suppose to go to work, but he ended up coming home around ten, thank goodness because this morning I wasn't sure how I was going to get through the day without him. He got rained out of work, which really sucks in a way because we need the money now more than ever. We'll manage though. By the end of the day I actually started really feeling better and was actually able to eat dinner with the family, although I ate way slower than everyone else and was only able to get down half of what Murphy ate, which really sucks. I've lost weight, I can feel it and see it when I put on my clothes I really couldn't afford to loose anything but I'm sure once I'm 100% I'll be able to put it back on. I have been having issues with my jaw, it kind of feels like it wants to lock up on me which really hurts, and its the only real pain I've been having since about 2 in the afternoon. My stitches keep feeling like I have something stuck in my teeth and are so annoying I'm stressing out because of it!
In other news, Brian finally wrote his name for me, and did a great job. He got to play with his Legos and his v-smile! I was so proud of him. I went and got an ink cartridge for my printer so now I can print them out some worksheets, Rhayne is doing good with guidance writing her name, she does the work but she won't do it right without the assistance, which is weird. One day at a time, I figure since we just started this a few days ago with her, I'll keep assisting her for another week then I'll let her trace on her own. I finally found some of those thick beginners pencils at Staples. I also bought them some scissors and some glue sticks so we can do some art and crafts, with Christmas coming up it will be a nice opportunity to have them really get in the spirit of things by making some decorations. Last year we made all of our Christmas tree decorations, but I did most of the work because the kids really didn't seem too into it, I believe this year will be a bit different I probably won't be as depressed as I was last year because a lot of stuff was really going wrong then, but now things are settled and *knock on wood* things are really looking up. We won't be able to get to the coast for Thanksgiving like we wanted to because of all this time off of work Brian's been having to take for me, and because of the bills from it, I'm hoping I can talk my mom into coming up here for Thanksgiving, but who knows. I think she's going to be upset about it, I haven't gotten around to telling her because I can never remember to tell her when I have her on the phone-hopefully writing this down here will make me remember to tell her before she reads it because she defiantly be mad at me if she has to read it here first won't she? Well, that's all for today I suppose.

The Day after the Surgery

Man am I swollen! I look like I've been beat up...seriously. I've been following all of the guidelines, so I think I'll be ok. I'm not in too much pain, but that could also be because I've been on top of the pain killers, which if you know me you'd know that I'm not too keen on taking so I'm pretty loopy! I just don't really want my mouth to hurt. I've chewed a bit today, but my mouth is so stiff that I really don't want to push it. I'm also terrified of getting food stuck in the holes, the bottem gums are stiched up, but the top arent. I've been washing my mouth out with salt water rinces after each time I do eat something, and by eat I mean a slim fast shake or yogaurt, I did have a soft cookie today and a bit ago I tried half of a beefy cheesy melty thingie from taco bell that I bought the day before the sugury because I decided I was going to pig out before I couldn't eat for I didn't know how long. I didn't eat it then because I got full, but when I ate it just a bit ago I had to take tiny bites and it took almost an hour to eat it. My mouth also hurts pretty bad from the chewing right now. I still haven't gotten my feeling back in my chin but that was one of the possible side effects of the sugery, so I went into it knowin that could happen. I actually feel like I'm in not nearly the pain I was in a week ago, so I'm happy about that, I'm also happy that I won't have to go through that ever agian. I'll have to wait to schedule my cleanings until the new year as I maxed out my insurance for this sugery, but its really NBD, I figure I'll be wanting to wait until after the holidays and I'm sure its going to be about the time they roll around that I'll actually be up for having any one else bothering with my mouth. I'm hoping that I won't end up loosing too much weight over the healing process, because I really can't afford to loose any more weight. I lost a lot when we were living in the hotels because I was so stressed out. Well, I'll leave you with a chipmunk shot of me:


Peace Out!

After the Sugery

Well, its done...the teeth are out. I was so nurvous this morning, and aparently it was all for nothing. I got there and went to the Op room where I was introduced to the anastesiologist, who I adored. He was so funny! I was all talking about my bad experiance with my anastesiologist when I had Murphy and the next thing I know I was being told "Its all over with." I woke up all weirded out, and extreamly talkative although I couldn't speak very well. On the way home we picked up my scrips, and then the truck broke down about a quarter of a mile from the apartment! OMG I was so upset, lucky us though, we had some REALLY nice people help push our truck out of the intersection then after helping us try to get it to run again, and failing they gave us all a ride home, the lady had her husband come by trying to see if he could bring their tow rope, but they couldn't find it, aparently they loaned it to a friend. They were the nicest people-I wish I could remember their names now, I really can't. The numbness in my mouth is now starting to wear off, but I took a couple of the pain pills while we were in the parking lot messing with the truck, I also took out the gauze, and that actually helped me feel much more comfortable, I suppose I should put some more in as its bleeding, but I really couldn't stand to have it in my mourth, and I know I can't spit, but its way in the back o my mouth so I don't really taste it as its going down my throat. I'm a little worried because one of the possible side effects of the sugery was loosing the feeling in my tounge, lips, cheeks and/or chin, I haven't gotten them back yet but I do feel the numbing starting to wear off...hopefully it will come back. They said that it is VERY rare for this to be perminate and most likley only lasts a few days to a week a few months at the most. My bottem lip looks like I had a collegin implant and if it wasn't for the swelling in my cheeks I'd look pretty hot right now, well as long as I don't smile because I haven't dared to brush my teeth, and there is blood on my teeth, and where I wiped it off is a bit yellow. Eww. There is also a possibility of a sinus infection due to the top wisdom teeth's roots being connected to the sinus cavities, and its possible I'll have to go back to get those holes closed back up if it doesn't heal properly-I so hope this doesn't happen because I already have enough issues with my sinuses. All in all it wasn't to bad of an experiance and I believe once the numbing goes away I'll be able to have some yogaurt, right now I'm sipping on a slim fast shake, I was starving-I guess it's a good thing I like those things, right? I was thinking ahead last night when we went grocery shopping-figured I wouldn't be able to eat many solid food for a while, and I also knew that BECAUSE I COULDN'T eat I would end up being starved by the time it was over with, now normally I don't eat til lunch time any how, but when ever I CAN'T eat for whatever reason, I always end up hungry as a homeless person. I don't get it, I didn't get any coffee this morning, which really sucks-but I'll get over that. I may be able to have some tomorrow morning, and I think I'll need that kick in the morning I'm so sleepy right now, I'll probably be passing out shortly but I don't know how I"m going to sleep I generally sleep on my side, can't do that now though. Well-peace out!

Consult

So today was my consult for the surgery....I'm still a bit nurvous because he said there is a small chance in the nurves being messed up from the bottem wisdom teeth being taken out and causing my chin and lips being numb, and that the top ones could cause holes being in my sinuses, but honestly I'd rather deal with those issues than going through this pain three more times. He said that the feeling will come back in my lips and chin, and that if the holes don't close on their own I'll have to get surgery to fix that...but NBD really. At first I had the surgery for next Thursday, but Brian asked about getting some more pain killers to get me by for the week, but they decided to try to get me in tomorrow instead-which is totally what I prefer. I now have an apointment tomorrow at ten am and am not allowed to eat or drink after midnight, which is totally OK by me as I don't eat after 8pm normally any how, and I usually don't drink after 10, I'll be a bit bothered by not being able to have a cup of coffee in the morning but I'm sure I'll make it. They'll be putting me down for the sugery, which is great because I don't see how I'd be able to tolerate people playing in my mouth while I'm conscience. I'm so excited to finally be rid of this pain, although I'll have to go through a bit more pain to get there. Brian will be taking the next couple days off of work which is going to hurt us financially, but all in all we'll work it out. Well, until next time.......

Iggy

I got up this morning and while drinking my coffee I go over the morning headlines online. Man was I mad to find out what happened to one of my favorite celebs this weekend! Ellen Degenerous adopted a dog from Moms and Mutts, who she named Iggy, and got him nutered, and hired a trainer so she could acclimate him to her cats. When the training didn't work out and the dog just wouldn't mesh with the cats at all she decided to give the pup to her hair dresser so she could see him daily! The cats where there first and it wouldn't be fair to them now would it? Any whoo, the adjency called to follow up on the dog's progress and well being you know, that is a pretty cool thing for a shelter to do, right? Well, when Ellen told them about Iggy not gettin on with the cats to well, and how she decided to give Iggy to her hair dresser and her daughters, Moms and Muts told her to give them the dog back and ultumatlu took the dog away from a loving home! It is just absurd!!!!! I can understand their policies, but hell she could have just told them, "Oh Iggy's doing great! yadda yadda yaddda........." but she was honest and now those girls are being punished for this. PLEASE, read the artical and sign the petition. They should have just interviewed the family and gotten them to sign the paperwork that Ellen signed instead of ripping the pup from his home. They say they have a policy about small dogs not going to homes with children under the age of 14 "for the dogs protection" but thats stupid, I could understand if the girls' were babies, or tots....but they are 11 and 12, a 12 year old is legally allowed to babysit in most states, so why couldn't they have a dog? I have a small dog, a maltese, in my home with my 2, 3 and 5 year old....are they gonna come after me next? Screw them...they'll get my pup over my dead body. My dog isn't any any harms way, the kids love on him and pet him but they don't hurt him, they know the rules we don't hurt animals. If I ever caught my kids hurting him they would be in BIG trouble, that is a serious no no.

Today's log

Well, today was the first full day Brian went off to work since my tooth trouble started, Saturday he was home before I woke back up from the couple hours I got with the aide of painkillers, Sunday was his scheduled day off and Monday he took off to get me to the dentist. I took today to get caught up on the laundry I've neglected over the weekend, which was about 5 loads, and the little housework I wasn't on top of, which wasn't a big deal because I normally stay on top of it. I also got around to vaccuming upstairs and sorted through the kids' clothes so now I can find what I need when I go to their closet. All I have left to do is sweep and mop downstairs, which I purposly saved until after dinner because I wanted to have all of the days dirt to clean at once, and it's easier to do after everyone is settled with a full belly. I also was able to squeeze in a nap because I got all of the kids to take one, Murphy had his usual nap, Rhayne got in trouble for an attitude, and I've decided to start really working on Brian's name writing since I've finally made up my mind about waiting until next year to get him into kindergarden-I really don't think he's ready for it now. He is to take 30 minutes after lunch to really TRY to write it out, if he does good trying he gets to go upstairs and play with his legos, which he is only allowed to play with when Murphy is sleeping, or if he doesn't want to apply himself, he has to take a nap. He opted for doing a great job for the first ten than giving up and scribbling for the next 20, so a nap he got. I know he has it in him, he just doesn't want to apply himself, and since he doesn't want to apply himself, I'm not going to reward him for a job well done! I hope I'm doing the right thing-I've been working with him since May with this, and he just wants to be hardheaded, now he has a bit of structure with it, so hopefully it will help. Tomorrows another day and I really am rooting for him to at least try as hard as he can. I'm not asking for perfection by any means, just for the best I know he can do. He is great with follow the number things, and that isn't much diffrent than tracing then doing it on your own is it? After nap time, I started dinner and Josh came in with a pizzone.....and attempted to eat it in front of my kids when dinner was being cooked! No, I wasn't having that so we told him to go somewhere where he could eat it away from them, he got huffy-which I don't unerstand, this is OUR house and WE pay the bills we are just letting him stay here to get back on his feet out of the kindness of our hearts, he should be able to respect our home. He knows that the kids love pizza and if they see someone eating something that they really like they won't eat their dinner...I don't understand where he gets off getting pissed off at us. I promise this, when he has children that are about my kids' age, I'll be headed over to his house with a pizza in hand around dinner time that I will promptly eat in front of them, just to prove the point. I really probably won't do this, but it was really asenine of him to do something like that. Well, I suppose I'm relaxed enough to get the kitchen cleaned up from after dinner now. Just wanted to vent a bit.

Oh my aching mouth

So I've generally had no real issues with my mouth over the years, a small cavity as a teen, and sensitive teeth as long as I can recall, but nothing to really cry over.
UNTIL Friday, I thought it was a cavity or worse an absess....boy was I wrong. Turns out, my wisdom tooth is comming in completly wrong, I could have sworn I already got them in about 3 years ago, but I was wrong. The gums swole up so high I couldn't even close my mouth by Saturday morning, and because of the pain I didn't get a wink of sleep. I called several dentists, knowing none would be open but I tried any ways. Brian later called a few of their emergency numbers, and finally got a hold of a dentist, Dr. David B. Sittason (pronounced citizen, weird huh) and he was all set to go a head and come in to see a NEW patient on a SATURDAY!!!!! But by then the pain wasn't too intence because the tooth finally broke through and caused all of the built up fluids to drain-nasty really nasty taste, let me tell you-so I scheduled an apointment for today. I went in and after two extreamly painful x-rays of my left jaw, I ended up getting a full x-ray of my mouth, which was enevitable because it seems I need all four of my wisdom teeth taken out! I also found out that other than some tarter build up I have a very healthy mouth, yay for me....especially since I haven't visited a dentist in about 7 years. I scheduled a consult appointment with Lee A. Kamelchuck at Center of Maxill of facial surgery (or something, I think that's abbreviated) for Thursday and from then I'll get my wisdom teeth removed then when I'm feeling up to more intrusion of the mouth I'll be scheduling 4 appointments to rid myself of my tarter build up, then from then I'll just have to do the routine dental appointments. I'm a bit nurvouse about the sugery part, but I think everything should be ok. Well, that's all for today I suppose I'll keep an update on the events to come.

Brian's 5 Birthday

Since we were staying at a hotel for his birthday this year, we decided to hold off on the 'party' and presents for Brian, we did however celebrate by going to chuckey cheeses:

He rode a motion train ride,


and a big truck


And a horse. I thought I got more pictures of him playing the games, but I suppose we were so busy playing the games with him that we didn't actually get any shots of it. Well, a month and a half later we were finally settled enough to give him his birthday 'party'. (I '' party because it was only the family with decorations and such....) He went out with uncle Josh to chuckey cheeses to give us time to decorate, and came home flabbergasted. His words were "What tha....what's all this about?"

The kitchen after it was decorated.


The cake


Our little helper who kept wondering why Brian got another Birthday since she hasn't had her birthday again yet.


Not too good a shot, but its him coming in to the house after going out.


Him sitting waiting for his cake, all excited about it all. Ok, well he LOOKED excite BEFORE the shot was taken, now he looks a bit out of it.


Blowing out the candles.


Cutting the cake


Brian eating


Rhayne eating


Murphy-who was in a bad mood because he was woken up from a nap-eating


"Its some gooooooood cake!"

Present Time

His army men.


His Ninja turtle.


Shrek one and two


Shredder


His Power Rangers .

All in all it was a good afternoon!

Until after dinner where I got lip about helping clear the table out of him, then later grumbles about giving me a goodnight kiss because he got in trouble for not helping clear the table. Makes me really want to rethink giving him an extra birthday celebration. Ungratfulness, I swear. I don't understand what made him think that because we threw a party for him he thinks he is better than the rest of the family. Dern kid. Oh well, hopefully he'll eventually learn his lesson.

No more Memphis...

Well, we didn't move to Memphis after all...instead we moved to Decatur, AL. I was a bit hesitant at first because you know, its Alabama-and I've heard tons of horror stories from that state....but you know, you really shouldn't listen to all that you hear. The city we are located in is really lovely. It's not too big and it's not too small, the community is curtious and the place has anything you could ask for. We are about 20 minutes South West from Huntsville and about 45 minutes North East of Burmingham so if I want the taste of the city life for a bit I can just hop in the truck and head on down. We haven't quite found a place yet because for the first while we were there we didn't know how long we'd be there then once we did we started looking and really haven't found anything that screams love me to us just yet-but we are sure its there. We actually have decided for the time being we'll just stay in an apartment or town house, but when we finally came to that decision we had to head to Blythville, AR. We'll only be here for another day or so, and I'm so ready to get back. They have this park there that is wonderful! There are baseball fields, tennis courts a track, and two play grounds. One is just your typical play ground with kiddy stuff on one side and training equipment on the other, so its kind of boring but the other side is AWESOME. Its like a huge fort, I have some pictures for you to take a look at, they say a picture's worth a thousand words right, so I'll let them do the 'splainin for me!
I followed Rhayne around while the boys played with daddy....Here lets go on a tour with her.

Steering the Pirate ship!


Finding Treasure.


A place to climb, and stuff to hide in.


The Swings


The slides and rope climbers.

I have to get some better shots of the place to do it better justice, next sunday we'll probably hit the park like we normally do but its really cool!

To the River we went

So Brian had a day off, and instead of spending it at home-we spent it at the river...ok so we spent a few hours, if that at the river just for something to do. I don't really like this river for some reason, but yesterday I tolerated it. We got some pictures of the kids playing...they had a blast.


Murphy decided he didn't want to wear his floaties so he ripped them off and ran to daddy who held him for quite a while before Murphy decided it was funner to play in the mud puddle by me instead of sitting still with daddy.



Rhayne stayed rotten, this picture shows her actually being good-but

here she is running to the current, she was constantly doing that! She kept running tward it and laughing when she got caught in it. It wasn't deep where the current started but it was quick and I couldn't even hold myself up in it really-well once I actually got in the water, which wasn't for long because this guy kept staring at me and it was giving me the creeps. So we left, and he left too. Whatever.

So here is a picture of LB pretending to swim, he isn't really swimming he is more or less crawling but he swears he was swimming. LOL

Still not puffing

So its been a bit over a week since my last full cigarette, and honestly I've been taking a toke here and there from other's smokes-but don't like it any more. I just think I want the smoke. I do feel as if something is missing, like I'm forgetting to do something-but I'm sure that will pass once I'm used to not smoking. I've got to do something about the eating though, it is the reason I started back smoking to begin with really, but now that I've lost the weight from the pregnancies it's time to stop the only thing I do unhealthy. If only I can figure out how to not eat to fill that need. I suppose I'll eventually figure it out but for now it's bothersome. Well, hopefully I can keep the nicotine out of my body for good, one day at a time.

Boy was I sick...

Last monday after we went out to eat I had this terrible gas like pain. Boy it hurt so bad but I just walked around and acted normal because I thought it was gas and would eventually move on. Move on it did, it wrapped around my right side strait into my back, about near the bottem quarter midway between my spine and the outside. The pain was almost unbearable, but thinking it would just go away in the morning, I went on to bed after some tossing and turning to try to get comfortable. Tuesday morning came and I was pretty much fine except a nucence in my back, a pain but not unbearable-kind of like a bruise. So I went through the day like normal; cook, clean, laundry, play with the kids, clean some more, watch a bit of tv....cook some more you get it the same ole stuff. I was fine, until bed time rolled around-the unbearable pain was back and I couldn't understand what it was or why it hurt so badly. Next morning I wake up-nautious, and in a ton of pain. Stayed pretty bad all day so I moved about the day extreamly slow, mostly laying on the couch-the center of the house-to monitor the children and attend them with as little effort as possible as I was in a ton of pain. Brian, poor dear he tried so badly to help but he was stuck at work and since I refused to go to the hospital there was little he could do as we really needed the money. Well, thursday rolled around and early that morning I woke up every couple hours from 3AM throwing up the nothing I ate all day wendsday and mostly water, until 7AM where the kids woke me up, Rhayne demanded me to lay on the couch so she could take care of me. Poor dear she was such a sweety. She 'helped' me on into the bathroom where I vomited some more, ugh. Then, to the couch we went. I laid down for a while, then surved up some cereal for the kids, easiest thing I could think of at the time. They ate, put their bowls away and we all watched TV for a few hours, man I am so greatful I have really good kids--sure they made a pretty big mess of the place, but they acted civil and when daddy took over he had the strength to help them clean the mess up so it wasn't so bad. I stayed pretty bad even through thursday and when he got home then we decided to go to the hospital, where I learned after some time that I have an infection on my kidney and they give me meds for that and the pain. That evening I slept like a baby and come Friday I wasn't doing my best but Brian stayed home, and broke the truck!!!! OK so not on purpouse, he went to get some grapes for me, I figured I may be able to keep them down and they can sit at room tempature and aren't too filling. On his way back the rear end just completly went out on him. He had to sit there for a few hours to wait for a tow. Luckily he put the little kids down for a nap and they were barely getting up when he got home so it wasn't too bad on me-I slept the rest of the day and through much of Saturday and by that evening I felt good enough to get out in the kitchen and prepare the next day's meal. I got a bit dizy and faint-oh because I never mentioned the fevers I was having. Boy, I could fall asleep anywhere, and I couldn't sit up for more than a few minutes at a time because I kept getting these moderatly high fevers- 102.4-103.0 degree and would have the oddest dreams that I thought where real. Plus they'd only last a little while but I'd break one and another would come, kind of like contractions on top of contractions but they'd last about 15 minutes, break I'd have a few minutes and they'd come right back. The weirdest thing I tell you. So I'd be sweaty and freezing constantly. I think between that and the nausia from the pain those were the worst! Well by sunday evening I was mostly myself, much like I was on tuesday I still had a bit of back pain but as long as I took a break every bit and I'd move at a moderate pace I was fine. But throught all that some good news did come, I quit smoking and today makes the first week I've gone with out a cigarette! I'm so proud of myself. I've actually been trying for a while but nothin helps like nausia-that's what help me quit with the kids, but now I'm not pregnant and I'm trying to make a new life choice decision...let's just hope I can make it. It's tough and today I had my very first craving but I give myself confidance, tell myself I made it this far I can go another week. One day at a time not a big goal.

RIP Sally

So Sally Goat was attacked by the neighboor's dogs a couple weeks ago. They decided to go on vacation and just leave their animals with no one to feed them and the two that perminatly live in the back yard-no matter what rain snow (ok so it doesn't snow here) extream heat whatever, they stay out side-decided they were too hungry to stay in the botched up fence they have and got out to eat my goat. They didn't leave her dead, oh no...they just ripped off her damn leg. So we got that all fixed up or whatever, and then yesterday something attacked her again. Couldn't have been anything too big, but it was enough to reopen her stub, and cause her more pain. Being that we couldn't afford any more vet bills nor can we stand to see her suffer...we put her down-or should I say Brian put her down. God, I feel so cold about it, but we really had no other choice. We are going to have to get rid of the goats next month before we leave and I'm sure no one else would want to deal with a three legged goat and would probably end up killing her as well. At least in this case she was taken out humanly. We have a place for Sandler where he will be treated like a pet as he is used to being treated now, so thank goodness for that...but we know Sally would have been put down either way so instead of having her suffer we just went ahead and took care of it. I was so upset, the kids don't really get it just yet, but they are young still.
The neighboors don't give a shit, they actually were able to get their dog's back from the Animal Control, who we called and had to wait three days then call 911 to actually get them to come out after one of the dog's attacked the sherrif that came out. In the mean time I fed them some of my dog food to keep them at bay, they even tried to attack me while I was feeding them....I feel sorry for the dogs, really I do. Those people really should have not been able to get them back, and should have been fined for neglecting their animals. It's reidculas. There is a leash law here-and I know when we lived in JAX, if your dog was caught running around and you wanted it back you'd have to pay a fine to get it back, if it attacked something/one you'd have to pay the fine and NOT get it back. That's how it should be here too. Well, Sally Dear, we'll miss you dearly-but you lead a good life until the end...you were treated like a family member, and we all loved you so!

Finger Painting Fun

Even as an adult I love to finger paint....but this time I let the kids do the painting. Again a thing we did last month but I have been so busy I really hadn't had much time to blog really much less upload the photos to the web. A few day's before father's day I brought the kids out to finger paint Daddy a pretty present for Father's day-he also got a PS3 so he had an AWESOME fathers day if I do say so myself. LOL. Well while they were finger painting I snapped some shots of them. Murphy was taking a nap so he kind of missed out, but later on he did spill the plate that was holding the finger paint containers all over his page...and made something quite pretty.


"Look at how pretty, just like me, huh mommy?"


"I am the artist in the family, mine looks the best!"

Here's how Murphy's turned out, honestly I think his looked the best. LOL-don't tell the others.


Close ups, or as close as I could get w/o disturbing the artists...





Such creativity, I actually MADE this finger paint. Corn Starch, water and food coloring. It's a pretty nifty trick my mom taught me as a kid. She wasn't always crazy, she actually was the best mom in the world....and really she still kind of is. She is very supportive, even though it may seem like she is condensending, but I get it from somewhere right? At least she took time to teach me things I could pass on to my children, finger paint, paper meshe', make at home play dough, ants on a log (bananas with peanut butter and rasins), snack night dinners, and much much more-as well as how to pay the bills and take care of adult tasks, she had a good idea on parenting and Brian and I are trying to keep a lot of that in our homes...but with little twists. Hey, parenting doesn't really come with a manual so it's all trial and error. Well to you and yours have a fun filled day!